Oil Lamp

The last thought I had came to me from the Visiting Teaching Message last month. I have to admit that when I first read the message, I didn't like it at all. It was on self reliance. We have had a lot of years filled with a lot of difficulties in just about every area you can think of. I have had many times when I have needed to humble myself and seek help and assistance when I couldn't do things on my own. I know there are times for this in each life, but as I read the message all I could think of in each category were the recent times that I haven't been self reliant and I needed the help of others. It made me feel terrible and VERY needy.

I know that is NOT the purpose of the VT messages and I tried to re-focus my view and gain strength from it. The thing that was brought to my mind was the parable of the ten virgins. I have always enjoyed that parable and thought of the preparation that each virgin needed to do to be ready when the bride groom came. How it was essential for each to have her OWN oil and the oil could not be shared or collected by another. But what I've never pondered was what they did with the oil once it had been collected and how it was a resource that is used and does get depleted over time.

I compared it to my testimony and spiritual and emotional health or strength. I have had times in my life where my oil in these areas was full to overflowing and I never thought I would ever see/feel a shortage. But what I have come to realize over the years of trials is just how important it is to work to keep filling your lamp. Looking back it is amazing to me to see just how low and almost completely DRY my lamp has become at times. I know that in this life we are here to help each other and assist each other. Yet there are things that MUST be done on your own. Others can not help with them, no matter how badly they would like to, and no matter how badly you would like them to. Sometimes, the cup cannot pass over you and you must drink it. The ONLY one that can help is the Savior. Your relationship with Him is the ONLY help you have to refill your oil. He is the bridegroom and He is the one that lets you in once you do your part. He is the living water and his well will never run dry.

We must be self reliant to the degree we can be, but we are never alone. We always have our Savior and his grace to make up the difference. I'm so grateful for the atonement and for the mercy and grace which I receive when I fall short. And I'm glad to know that self reliance doesn't mean I must rely on MYSELF alone...